This week, as we ENCOUNTER GOD at a deeper level than the week before, being transformed by that ENCOUNTER with Him, I wanted to share some thoughts from readings in works from a Shayna Bailey.
Like Shayna, I have a confession to make. I have commitment issues! Not the kind that we normally think about.

I have commitment issues with GOD!

I like the concept of unconditional love. Realistically though, love always comes with conditions - at least in our fallen world. I know that my wife loves me, my children love me, my friends love me, but I also know that life comes with certain expectations. I know what life choices displease others, so I try to avoid those choices, but I also try to avoid the people, when I think i have disappointed them. And, of course, I place expectations on others as well. And the cycle begins for them also.

So how does this relate to GOD?

Well, imperfect, conditional love has trained me to expect rejections when I fall short. Since I am sinful, though, I always fall short in my relationship with GOD. When I do, I expect judgment, condemnation and wrath. I fear ensuing punishment at times. I even start to doubt that GOD still intends to bless me in my weakness.

GOD's unconditional love is just too good to be true, I conclude!

My weak and tired response is what it always is when I feel rejection coming: I pull away first. Rather than wait for the hellfire and damnation, I get out of the way and hide. I wrap myself up in my shame and convince myself that GOD is as disappointed in me as I am in myself.

Unfortunately, distancing myself from GOD seals off the blessings that He has in store for me. I miss the lessons intended to teach me, and I waste time trying to figure out how to restore my relationship after I finally realize that the sky is not going to fall.

My commitment issues with GOD are completely self-defeating!

Psalm 103:8ff reminds us that GOD is "compassionate and gracious," "slow to anger," and "abounding in love." Wow! Where is the judgement and wrath? We are told that He does not punish us as we sometimes deserve (103:10). Rather, we are assured that He has compassion on us and "remembers that we are only dust" (103:14).

Romans 8:38 reminds us, "Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of GOD that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." It gives me comfort to know that even when I get scared, pull away, or just feel distant and unworthy, GOD is still committed to me. Nothing can separate me from His love even when I deserve to be rejected.

ENCOUNTER THE WORD

Read Psalm 103:6-18.

SOME ENCOUNTER QUESTIONS

• What are the pros and cons of commitment? How does this apply to relationships? to GOD?
• Where in your life do you depend on commitment? What should commitment to GOD mean to you?
• How do you perceive GOD's level of commitment to you? Have you talked with GOD about this?
• Have you had commitment issues lately? What are you doing about them?